Archive for Who names their kid Anfernee?

I want lava-cake breath

Posted in Uncategorized with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on October 3, 2010 by Diego Serrano

God-

Why does my breath smell like dog-shit every morning when I wake up?
I floss, brush my teeth, even use Listerine instead of water in my Waterpik…..and I still smell like a fresh dog pile each morning.

Please tell me what I need to do in order for my breath to smell like freshly baked goods upon awakening….or at the very least, bacon and eggs.
Emerging from one’s slumbers (and Camp Morningwood) with breath that could repulse even a Turkey Buzzard is not cool.

I want to wake up smelling like a sugary-chocolate treat…like maybe a hot lava-cake…with a generous dollop of whipped cream. (On the side, of course).

Oh, and please don’t bring two spoons…I want to enjoy me all by myself.

Yours,

Diego

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